Expecting a baby

Maybe you’re in your final trimester or even the last few weeks of pregnancy, and suddenly it hits you: I AM ABOUT TO HAVE A BABY. Read on for our top tips for the mother-to-be, on how you can mentally prepare for the adjustment to motherhood. 

Expectant mothers can feel stressed about having all of the baby ‘stuff’

Of course, we recommend that you take care of the essentials to make you feel prepared for having a baby. It usually helps to talk to friends or other moms about what they couldn’t live without, and maybe you’ll have much of this gifted to you. But know that if you really need something, you can always go get it or have it delivered within days. Some pregnant woman want cute crib sheets to feel ready. You may need a giant stuffed giraffe for the nursery – to each their own! Give yourself permission to prepare the essentials but not expect that you will have everything you could ever need. This is why pharmacies are open late and Amazon exists!

Declutter your space before your baby arrives

With the arrival of a new family member right around the corner, now is the perfect time to get rid of unwanted clothes or clutter. If you are having trouble with the physicality of this task, we encourage you to recruit the help of a partner, trusted friend, or family member. And it can be a fun and therapeutic way to make space for life with a new baby. 

Treat yourself to some self-care 

This will probably be neglected for the next year, so get a haircut, a massage, go to the dentist, or sit at the beach and read a book. Whatever you consider self-care – stock up now! 

Allow yourself to rest and sleep in the third trimester

In the third trimester, it can be helpful to your mental and physical health to stock up and sleep as much as possible. It may not be physically possible to save it for later, however there is some scientific evidence that the human body can help prepare for periods of sleep debt by intentionally resting more ahead of time. Giving yourself permission to rest and sleep as much as your body needs to, especially in the last couple of months when the biological energy going into your pregnancy is going to really ramp up. And again, sleeping in when the baby comes will be much more challenging and broken. If you’re not sure where to start, we recommend this article on sleep hygiene during the third trimester.

Reflect on your expectations around life with a baby

Journal or talk to your friends who are already mothers about what it was like for them. Everyone’s journey is so unique – but hearing others’ stories helps us to keep our own expectations realistic.

Encourage conversations with your partner about becoming parents

For example, you could ask your partner:

  • What are you most anxious about? 
  • What is our postpartum plan?  
  • Are our finances in order? 
  • Who is going to help in the early days, and for how long?
  • What are our expectations of each other? And our families?
  • Knowing our strengths and challenges as a couple, where might we do well in this adjustment? 
  • Where might we struggle?

We know these conversations aren’t necessarily as fun as picking out baby names, but they are SO SO important! AND you may find that if you make them a priority, you feel so much more prepared. So much relationship conflict comes down to differing expectations and not communicating well about your vision as you enter this next chapter. So talk about things NOW! To help you get started, our team has created a low-cost resource to help! If you’re not sure where to start with your partner, check out the Conversation Starters Before Having a Baby.

Would you like to learn more about how to set your relationship up for success into motherhood?  

Click here to learn about our online course for expectant parents: Babyproof your Relationship! 

Are you looking to feel more supported in the transition to motherhood?

We have a team of counsellors that can help you deal with the emotional experience of pregnancy and postpartum. If you’re not sure what kind of support you need, we’ll be happy to match you with a counsellor who can help.